Who Lives in a Pineapple (Extended Version)
Original shortfiction by TheMaximumMatt. begin with Lola entering the kitchen grumpily Lola: (groans) I can’t believe Mom is forcing me to wash the dishes as a form of punishment. It’s Lana’s fault for starting it! (Groans some more) I guess I might as get started on washing the dishes. How hard could it be? a giant pile of dishes next to the sink. Lola gags at the sight of it. Lola: What?! I have to do ALL that?! I’ll never get it done! (Sighs) Well, at least it’s better than being grounded for a week or something… she gets up on the stepstool in front of the sink and begins preparation Lola: Eww! I cannot work in my lovely gloves! off her usual pink gloves and puts on the bigger, yellow rubber gloves, which look to be too bad for her I also gotta use this! puts on gas mask I do not want any of that gunk to go on my face! And one more thing! puts on apron to protect her dress Ew… let’s do this! is about to grab the sponge, but the sponge has disappeared from the sink Lola: off gas mask What the?! around the sink and dishes to find sponge. Lola: Where’d the sponge go?! ???: I’m right here, silly! jumps at the sound of the unfamiliar voice. She turns around to see what it is and there standing on the floor behind her… was a talking, anthropomorphic sponge with brown, square-shaped pants, big, blue eyes, and a large pair of buck teeth smiling right at her. Lola screams at this horrific sight Lola: AAAAAAAHHHH! What are you?! How did you get here?! Who are you?! What are-! ???: Stop your worrying, silly! I’m Spongebob. Spongebob Squarepants. I’m here to teach you how to have fun while washing the dishes. Lola: (Still scared, she starts panting quickly) No! This cannot be real! This cannot be real! I must be dreaming! Yeah… that’s it! This is all a silly little dream! This is just some nightmare I will wake up from right now! Spongebob: Don’t be silly. You’re not dreaming, Lola. Lola: AHHH! What you mean I’m not dreaming?! How do know my name?! Spongebob: Duh, I know everybody’s name, silly. I’ve heard a lot about you, pageant queen. Lola: (pants even more) NO! Get away from me, you mutated freak! (takes out spatula) I have a spatula and I’m not afraid to use it! Spongebob: Hey! You have a spatula too? I use those to make Krabby Patties, the best sandwiches ever! Lola: I don’t care about crabs or burgers or something! Get away from me! swings spatula at Spongebob, slicing him in half. Lola is at first relieved, but then the sponge halves start to stick back together and Spongebob is back to normal Spongebob: Silly Lola! You can’t kill me! I’m deep voice IMMORTAL! Lola: AHHH! Someone help me! There’s a crazy talking sponge here and I think he wants to hurt me! Spongebob: You’re cute when you’re scared! (Laughs in his usual, annoying fashion) Lola: STOP! Your laugh hurts my ears! Spongebob: (Laughs even louder) Lola: AHHHH!!! throws dishes at the talking sponge. She misses with every throw and the dishes break when they hit the floor Lola: WHY WON’T YOU JUST LEAVE ME ALONE?! Rita: LOLA LOUD! scene leaves from Lola’s perspective. The kitchen has now become a wreck. All of the dishes are broken, the sink has overflown, and kitchen utensils are everywhere on the floor. The sponge is seen on the floor, only it’s inanimate Rita: What the heck did you do here?! Lola: Mom! Thank goodness you’re here! There’s a talking sponge standing right over there and he’s freaking me out! Rita: A talking WHAT now?! Lola: Now it’s real! Right there! Don’t you see it?! sponge is still inanimate from Rita’s point of view, revealing that the talking sponge might just have been a hallucination. Rita: (angrily)… Lola. I’ve had it with you. Go to your room. You’re grounded for a whole month! Lola: NONONONO! I swear, there was a sponge here and… actually... YES! Thank you! Being grounded will be much better for me! (Laughs while running off crazily) Rita: Sheesh... I guess even washing dishes is too much for Lola... goes to pick up the sponge, when... Spongebob: Hello Rita Loud! (laughs) Rita: (screams in terror and runs to the twins' room) Lola! Come back! I'm sorry I didn't believe you! and Rita run across the couch where Lana holds an ice pack. Lola is laughing hysterically as she runs in her room, while Rita follows in hot pursuit. Lana: (Laughs) A talking sponge? Really? Lola must be going crazy or something... man is she annoying sometimes. And I can't believe Mom would also think that... truly annoying. small, pink sea star lurks from behind the couch Patrick: Did somebody say something about being annoying? (Laughs) Lana: AHHH! Mom! Lola! to Rita and Lola Patrick: Was it something I said? runs up to him. Spongebob: Patrick! Patrick: Spongebob! hug each other and laugh. Spongebob: So buddy, what are you doing here anyway? Patrick: I thought that maybe you'd gone on dry land again, without even telling me! (starts bawling) Spongebob: Aw, come on Pat, you know I would never do it intentionally. Patrick: Ya really mean it, Spongebob? Spongebob: Of course Pat! Patrick: Thanks! Now let's go and talk to those ladies! Spongebob: Okie Dokie, artichokie! (laughs again) run to the twins' room where Lola, Lana, and Rita are arguing about what they've been seeing. Lana: (describing Patrick) I'm telling you, Mom! It was pink, chubby, wore green shorts and had a really dopey voice! Category:Episodes Category:Episodes focusing on Lola Loud Category:Episodes focusing on Lana Loud Category:Episodes focusing on Rita Loud